Last week, the moms and I discussed what it is like to parent through those “terrible twos“. This time around we’re talking about the three- and four- year olds. The Boy turns three in July, and I am beginning to notice a change in his behavior during certain situations.
Leila: My son turned 4 on April 27th. He has been much easier to deal with for about 2 weeks prior to turning 4! His behavior went from being untolerable to tolerable!
Valerie: My 7 yr old is awesome, but she has always been a pretty awesome kid. My 4 yr old is always getting in trouble, but she is very strong willed. In my case I think it has a lot to do with personality and in that case I have a long road ahead of me for my youngest.
Cyndy: My daughter turned 4 on March 17 and gradually I am seeing improvement and it has been fabulous. I still see spurts of the behavior we were seeing, but we really “drew our line in the sand” about 4 weeks ago. It may sound harsh, but we noticed she was taking for granted the things that we have – toys, movies, Wii, DS, etc. – so I took away ALL of her DVDs for about a week. Then I have been giving them back, or not, based on behavior. It has been very effective!
Emily: I am so glad to hear this will get better! The Boy turns three in July and lately has been acting like “someone else’s kid’s” There are days when I want to move out!
Ghada: Hmmm…well, I was one of the ones that found 2 and 3 to be easy. Now at 4 he is so knowledgeable and able to argue a point – it can be tough sometimes butting heads with a 4 year old. But on the other hand, he gets our humor and he can help out in ways that he has always wanted to but not get frustrated – like cleaning up, picking out fruits at the shop…
Mary: I’m with Ghada, my son was a wonderful toddler but having the vocabulary to express his anger with me did not always go well either, like the first time he told me that he hated me. Sure, it hurt, but heck it made me think I was on the right track. Baby girl, who is the definition of a terrible two year old, might not make it to see if the three’s are better – just kidding. I may not live through her screaming fits but I guess that is why they made ear plugs. 🙂
Ghada: So have any of you heard the theory that these terrible tantrums are due to a hormonal surge…AND, this same type of hormonal surge happens in their teens. So apparently the toddler tantrums are just a preview to what they’ll be like as emo teens *shudders*
Lena: WOW, Ghada, that’s a scary thought.
Mary: Nooooooooooooo!!!!!!!
Lena: My daughter was horrible when she was 2 and 3, but by 3.5 she became such a little helper. I am truly enjoying her.
Gena: My 3 year old’s behavior is like a rollercoaster. He can be an angel for days and then a demon for days. I’m glad it’s not all the time naughty kid, but those bad days are B-A-D. I think I’ve come to grips that every age has it’s bad sides.
How did you parent through the threes and fours?
This valuable input has been brought to you by Leila of Life as Leels, Valerie of Valerie’s Reviews, Cyndy of Mama Does It All, Ghada of Mama goes BAM, Mary of iNeed a Playdate, Lena, Way2Goodlife, and Gena of Life With Captain Fussybuckets
My son was tough at 2, really bad at 3, and has been much much better at 4. He still has trouble with impulse control and we still have the occasional tantrum (esp when he’s tired or hungry), but in general I can reason with him, and he is much more eager to prove that he is mature and ready for responsibility. He also understands discipline better. His brother, who is about to turn 3, is the real challenge now. He’s sweet, but man can he scream and throw a fit. Though his language skills are advanced for his age, he’s still highly emotional and tantrums are his default coping mechanism. But, he’ll grow!
It’s tough having a child with advanced language skills. As parents, we often forget that they do not have the coping skills that go along with it! Glad to hear that it gets better/easier as they grow.
I totally agree with the hormones thing. I notice about every 1/2 year is the worst. Just after their birthdays they go through a growth spurt and eat everything in sight and sleep really hard. When they finally get through that couple of months then its like they have newfound knowledge they must test on us. Then it takes us a few weeks to realize what has gotten into them and if we really buckle down for about 2-3 weeks and stay really on point then they go back to normal until the cycle starts all over again. My daughter is 8 3/4 and son is 3 1/2 and he is hitting this part of the cycle right now. And both of them were more difficult at 3 than 2.
My son turns three next week. He’s already a completely different kid. It’s kinda scary!