Before becoming a stay-at-home mother, I had a long career in the restaurant industry. I worked in operations as a server, a bartender, and a line cook before transitioning into a role with the corporate office. And before The Boy was born, The Texan and I would dine out several times a week. To say that my experience in the restaurant industry is not the norm is probably an understatement.
I have a full understanding of how the industry works, and as a mom, I understand how wonderful it is to head out to a restaurant for a relaxing meal. Having said that, I do not feel that children should be banned from restaurants. We’ve been taking The Boy to restaurants since he was an infant. It’s something The Texan and I enjoy very much – though we’ve cut back significantly. I know that we’re fortunate to have the income to dine out, and don’t view it as a “treat” like we should.
The Boy knows what type of behavior is expected from him while we’re in a restaurant. The funny thing about that is the behavior we expect in a restaurant is the same behavior that we expect at home. On one occasion, he was acting inappropriately and The Texan took him outside immediately. He knows that we’re serious, and has not behaved inappropriately again.
Drawing on my experience as a restaurant employee, I know that the lunch meal period is not typically full of couples trying to enjoy a romantic meal. We decided that is the best time to go out with The Boy, and dinner time with a toddler is crazy by design anyhow. Dinner-Bath-Books-Bed. It’s hard to keep that schedule if you head to a restaurant for dinner.
To parents I say – bring your well mannered children to restaurants! Teach them the importance of saying “please” and “thank you”. Teach them how to order from a menu, and the importance of leaving an adequate gratuity for your service provider. But please, leave your ill mannered children at home.
To couples looking for romantic meals I say – try dining after 7:30pm, when most {good} parents are home tucking their little ones into bed. Don’t ask to sit in a booth – that’s where hostesses like to put little kids. Check the menu prices, chances are if you’re paying a bit more there won’t be [many} children dining!
What about you? Do you think children should be banned from restaurants?
What what NaBloPoMo is all about? NaBloPoMo, created by the brilliant minds at BlogHer, is a month long blogging challenge to encourage you to write daily about a specific prompt. Today’s prompt was “How do you feel about kids being banned from places such as restaurants or airplanes?” Sign ups to participate in this month’s Blog Roll are now closed, but you may check out the participating bloggers here and the daily prompts are available here.
Good tips for child-free dining! When my daughter was a baby, she was always an angel at restaurants. My son purposefully toes the line when we eat out. We do try to make him behave, but if it doesn’t work, we take him to the car out of respect for the other diners. We also try to sit in the less-populated areas of the restaurant (usually the back) so we don’t have to worry as much about his noise.
Hi,
We are parents of a 5 yo and 3 yo. I think all children should be allowed into restaurants. I do, however; think that there should be times (4-7pm) when kids are cheaper/free to eat with paying adult. That would promote families to get in and out before the dinner rush!
Children in general should not. However, rowdy, unruly, and destructive children should be. Pet peeve: parents who ignore their children’s obnoxious behavior.
I have never heard of such a thing. This concept just seems crazy. If children are not allowed in restaurants, how they know how to behave once they become adults? Just seems like illogical thinking for whoever came up with that idea.
I worked in restaurants for over 10 years and I never once thought that children didn’t belong. Sometimes it was a great comfort having a child in my section that was cute, sweet, and polite. What to do with all those kids menus and crayons??
I agree with your post, children don’t need to be banned from restaurants. There are some restaurants that are more kid-friendly, and parents tend to bring their kids there instead of fancy formal restaurants. That works for everyone. I think most parents understand that unruly kids are not welcome in “grown-up” restaurants, and can decide for themselves whether their children are ready to be in that kind of environment.
I completely agree with you. I like the tip about not sitting in booths.
I don’t think that children should be banned from restaurants. They need to learn their limits and how to behave there. I also agree that for quiet and romantic dinner a couple should choose a later time of the evening and / or fancier restaurant.
I completely agree. We once worked at a children’s home and when we went out we took TEN teenage girls. All of which had behavioral issues and needed to learn how to behave in public. Kudos to you and The Texan!
Now that I have three boys 3 and under we dont go out but I believe children should not be banned from restaurants.
It is shocking to me when friends tell me they hardly ever take their kids to restaurants. If you don’t take them now, how are they ever going to learn? They’ll be pre-teens and not know how to order!! So, I completely agree with you. Take em out, but make em act right.
I used to think they should be banned..i know very insensitive but now that i have 2 nieces and expecting my first child, i think much much differently! However i think there are certain restaurant that you should not go to if you don’t want to make everyone, including yourself and your kids uncomfortable, thankfully more and more restaurants are become kid friendly 🙂
Generally if there’s an issue, it’s the parents who choose to do nothing instead of correct their children on how to act appropriately in public. Back in my day, if we were too loud as kids, we were banished to the car.
I think it depends on the restaurant. A restaurant that requires say reservations to be seated, a younger child probably should not be allowed. Now a regular run of the mill restaurant (Chili’s Applebee’s, IHOP, Denny’s, etc). I think it’s crazy to ban children! Like another poster said – how are they supposed to learn how to behave if they aren’t allowed in a restaurant?!?
Good tips! I agree that there is a responsible way to do it–but I do feel that restaurants are within their rights to choose to be childfree if that’s the atmosphere they desire.
I don’t think children necessarily need to be banned from restaurants. But I have had dinners interrupted due to out of control children and I have left a restaurant due to out of control children at 11pm at night. I also if I was on a date at a fancy restaurant not expect to see children there especially after 8pm. Most of the problems are caused by parents unwilling to correct their children. I know if I misbehaved in a restaurant at that age, I was taken outside and given a good talking to.
Never ever! To keep it short, everyone needs to learn how to behave in public.
I believe that children need to be taught manners that said My sister doesn’t do a good job of teaching her children manners and has been banned from bringing her children to a few local restaurants which I understand. My parents taught us to behave in public and back then if we miss behaved we would be taken out to the car and not allowed back in the restaurant. I have no problem with children in the restaurant but the need to be taken out until the can behave appropriately
I don’t think children should be banned from restaurants. It’s like everything, parents should set rules when going out. When our son would “act out” in a public place, one of us would take him out to the car and wait until the other was done. He would get upset, but it did not take long until he knew how to act in public 🙂
We take our kids to restaurants all the time, but we don’t go during peak hours. like you said, that’s how they learn manners and how to behave in public
Yes.
We wouldn’t have to have this discussion if parents were more responsible about raising their children.
Yes, I think it’s perfectly acceptable for a restaurant to say “no” to children.
And I shouldn’t have to change my dining schedule to suit families. Sorry. Your family is no more important than mine.
I don’t think children should be banned from restaurants. Children are people just like that drunk guy over there and that chick who is talking loudly on her cell. It would be nice if people taught their children proper behavior, but sometimes kids just behave like kids.
However, if you know your child is rambunctious, perhaps choosing IHOP over the Melting Pot would be wise.
I don’t think children should be banned, but I sure wish you could ban those parents who don’t make any effort to teach their children manners or control bad behaviors. Sure, even the best child has a bad day now and then, but I drive me insane when parents blatantly ignore unacceptable and disruptive behavior.