How much energy have you wasted focusing on negative things in your life? Why are you doing that? Life is full of many ups and downs, dips in the road are inevitable. It’s easy to let yourself fall into the depths of sadness, anger, and hate, let it go. Remember that love is easier than hate.
If you’re stuck in a negative space, try to focus on the beautiful things around you and be thankful for all that you do have. If you have a roof over your head, remember there are many who do not. If you have food in your pantry, remember there are many who do not. If you have a warm winter coat, remember there are many who do not.
One thing I am often reminding myself is that no matter how tough things get in my life, there is always someone who has it harder.
What do you do to remind yourself to focus on the positive?
I have always been a happy person and tried to choose feeling love over hate, but I realized when I was in college that I was still holding a grudge against someone close to me and so feeling true love for them was very difficult. I didn’t get over it over night, but withing the course of a few months I prayed and worked hard on truly forgiving them. Once I finally forgave them I completely let go of all the hurt feelings from the past and I felt love for them again. There was no longer hate in my heart. So whenever I feel hate I reflect on this and let it go.
It really is freeing and easier to love because you are letting go.
I completely agree – it is such a freeing feeling when you’re able to finally let go.
Hate is such a strong word. I can’t even imagine hating anything. With that said, yes, I think it was a big waste of time being angry at/hating/being mad at anything. It’s really hard to let it go because if you don’t, it really is bad for the heart (health and otherwise). For me, I have to pray because sometimes it really is hard to let things go. There is one incident in my life where I am still trying to forgive, and it’s been – 6 or 7 years since the incident.
It’s really hard saying – you have done something that by all definition should ruin our friendship – but I love you anyways.
It is hard to find the good in situations, and to let things go when you’re really hurt. Sometimes, it’s better to forgive, forget, and move on.
Thanks so much for stopping by! Have a wonderful day!
I pretty much do the same things you recommend. Today got the best of me though, I have those days sometimes where the hate I feel is so thick, I just feel like giving up and giving in.
I know what you mean! But, the day will get better and as long as you’re not wasting your entire life being a Negative Nellie, one day isn’t so bad.
Hope Wednesday is better for you!
I so agree, it takes far less energy to love, like, or even just feel indifferent about someone than to hate them. I can think of only one person that I truly despise, and she’s really a horrible person who tries to make life difficult for everyone around her, so she deserves it. But even with this person, I don’t waste too much energy thinking about it.
I know someone like that, too. I avoid her at all costs, too. To me, life is more fun when you’re enjoying things and being positive. Being negative is too much work for me!
Ugh, I have those negative days where I feel like nothing is going right for me, I want things I don’t have, etc. To change my focus, I look at my healthy, smart, and handsome little boy. Then, I think about what we DO have: a nice home, fully stocked kitchen, more clothing than we need, and most importantly, each other!
I think we all have those days where nothing is going our way – days when you want to crawl back into bed and have a “do over”. On those days, I think about how fortunate I am – all of my needs are met (shelter, food, clothing, etc), I have a wonderful son and a great husband. How could I not be happy?!
i focus on my kids to remind myself to remember the positive. i had a rough few years, but things have turned out great now. i just look at them & remember how good we have it because we have eachother
It’s important to focus on the good things that we have – even when things get rough, there is ALWAYS something positive going on, something to be thankful for!
Thanks for stopping by, have a great weekend!
I am keeping a gratitude journal – one thing, once a day that I am grateful for.
If you have an iPhone, you might like the Gratitude Journal app. I’ve been using it for a few months, it’s great!!
I try not to use the H word. However sometimes it just takes over and there goes my day! Sometimes, it even lingers through out the week. Staying positive, I think for many people is a work in progress, but keeping in mind and implementing some of the things you mentions, does help.
I have to work just as hard as being positive as I would at being negative. We all have things that don’t go to plan, but everyone also has wonderful things happening around them. For some reason, more attention is given to those who focus on the negative – and make everything into a big dramatic ordeal – maybe that encourages some to be negative, too?
I try not to waste my energy on hating something or someone. If it’s a person in my life I just say Bye Bye. If it’s a thing I try to change the situation. We lost our daughter at 4 months old. The death of a child really straightens out your priorities and teaches you to let the small stuff go. Trust me it really is small stuff. I just don’t want to waste my time or energy on that feeling.
I’m so sorry for your loss, Tammy. It is small stuff compared with the loss of a child.
I work in a middle school and hear the “hate” word all of the time. It really bothers me and I address it whenever I hear it.
I’m glad that you address it when you hear it, Wendy. Too often it goes ignored and festers.
Thanks for stopping by! Happy Wednesday!
i had to come by and read this again today. I also shared it with my 12 year old daughter, as I have been telling her things like this alot lately. she is getting heavily bullied at school, and her self esteem is at a zero. im trying everything i can to help her and showing her that people other then her Mom say this too, helped a bit. thank you
Jamie,
Sorry it’s taken me so long to get back to you. I’ve been thinking about your daughter and hope that she is doing well. Age 12 is tough, I hope that she has found a good group of friends to hang out with. Let her know that what others think of her and say behind her back isn’t important in life’s big picture. It’s important to look for the good when she can, and focus her energy toward those who are positive and pleasant to be around.
Hope all is well,
Emily